What a great day!

I am so grateful to be me today! I woke up to a wonderfully white day. I have been wondering where and when it was going to get here, because you know, Christmas just isn't Christmas without snow. The drive to work was a little slower than usual, but I still was able to make it in (another blessing). 

But the following is what REALLY is making my day great. I logged onto view my final grades for this semester and saw this....

Grade Report Martino, Jennifer L. Program Advisor Class First Major Second Major Academic Standing Undergraduate Academic year 1 Interior Design Internal Transfer Fall - 2010 Course Section Title Hours Final Grade FS103 B Color Theory 3.00 A FS101 A Drawing & Perspective 3.00 A GE130 A Art History 4.00 A FS102 B Fund. of Design 3.00 A GE085 C Transitional Mathematics 3.00 A

Yes, that is right, for a workload of 16 credit hours... I received all A's! Wahoo! I'm not sure if that is Dean's List or President's List, but I'm on someones list and it feels great! I will take a little time to celebrate and then buckle down for next quarter. What a great day!

I'm a Pisces... Who Cares?

I don't know if anyone else has ever come across someone like this, but I have, so here is my story...

As I was talking to someone about their behavior in the work place, they interrupted me and said, "Oh well, I'm a Leo, so I naturally am a leader. It's hard for me to take orders." My response... "Who cares? Did you agree to your job responsibilities when you received your orientation?"

I understand that there is a natural tie to your astrological sign and personality, but that doesn't define your character or JOB ETHIC. I could not believe that someone wanted to dismiss unprofessionalism based on their zodiac sign. So out of curiosity, I discovered that a Leo is an "incompatible" sign for Pisces. Does this mean, because I'm a Pisces, I should see about letting this "Leo" go? Fortunately, I'm not that retarded. I'm pretty sure they would never use that excuse again, if I came to them with this discovery.

->Music<-

I have noticed the last couple of weeks how much I depend on music. It sets my mood. It can either motivate me, stir up memories, or help clear my mind. I LOVE MUSIC! I might not know every single word in a song. I might not know who sings it. Heck, most of the time I don't even know the title. I don't care, it is the best way to express how I'm feeling, when I'm doing something. This is going to sound corny, but music makes my world go round. If you are interested to catch a glimpse of my personality, check out my awesome range of tunes on my new mixpod. I found this on my friend's blog and immediately had to have my own (Thanks, Lindsay!).

I know this post is really not anything special... I will follow up with my awesome Halloween costume party pics later this week (...maybe, if I get around to it.)

Good ol' Days of Halloween

For those of us who actually experienced Halloween and its glory in elementary school, do you find the streets eerily empty year after year? Where did Halloween go? I remember being out until 10:30 trick-or-treating (maybe not everyone did this, but I was the "fat kid". Still, I think you know where I'm coming from). Now instead of teaching our kids "Trick-or-Treat", we've instilled "stranger danger" as the theme. I realize the world isn't as naive as it use to be for kids, but that makes it all the more sad to me. Okay, I'll get off my soap box...
 

All that aside, I love getting dressed up and going out for Halloween. This year will be very laid back for me. I guess if all else fails, I could shock a few neighbors by showing up at their door. Now that I work at a Residential Treatment Center, I think it's a little inappropriate to wear my costume to work (darn!).

One thing I'm looking forward to is the day after Halloween. Why you ask? I get to start putting up the Christmas decorations at home and work, of course. Surprising? Probably not if you read my blog regularly. But here I am to spice things up... This year I've been requested to do it...by my manager. Okay, that probably wasn't shocking either. Anyways, in case I don't post anything next week...

HaPpY HaLLoWeeN (The good old fashioned kind)

Quick Thought: My Moment of Deep Thought

As I was getting ready today, I thought up a quote (or maybe even my new life moto) of how I want to live from this point forward:

Life is not one single moment, followed by happily ever after. It's more like multiple life experiences, and consciencely making the decision to be happy.
- Courtesly from the deep thoughts of Jen Z.

Yes, I realize this is just another version of another quote that may already be existing somewhere else.

...Art Institute of Salt Lake City...

It's official, I am back in school. I started yesterday and have made a few observations....

1) There are a lot of "creative" people that are really weird. 

2) It takes up a lot of my spare time (am I ready for this again?)

3) Most of the people at my school are in Graphic Design, Film and Photography, Web Design, but there are very few Interior Designers enrolled in the program.

4) In one day, I met another Interior Design student that is planning on transferring to another program. (I plan on transferring in June to Dallas Ai...cross your fingers, toes, legs, and whatever else for me and then say a prayer that it all works out.)

 

5) After being placed in the "Dummies Math" class, I am feeling extremely smart.

6) In my Drawing and Perspective class, I sat next to a young lady that just graduated High School. It was fine until three other guys came and sat next to her, all of a sudden she was dropping the "F" bomb more often than I could count. I guess I forgot how cool and hot that would make me look... oh well.

7) My car is a disaster with all my books and supplies I have to keep.

Don't take these observations as judgements. Just my perspective of the first day. Let's see what happens today...

Terms and Conditions

For those who have completed school, I am super envious. Good for you for taking the giant leap into debt, all to pursue your dreams. I am having a VERY hard time committing myself to that debt. I feel like I am inching my way towards my career dreams, but the dollar tag is so discouraging. Here's why...

Today, I read through my Terms and Conditions of my collegiate loan. Now, my schooling isn't cheap, so not only do I have federal loans that I will have to pay back, I will also have to pay back private loans. For this year alone, I am having to take out $15,000 in private loans. This doesn't sound bad, until you read the fine print. I do not have a maximum interest rate on my loan, which means, whatever they give me now for the APR can skyrocket above and beyond what is listed on my documents. Case and point, based on a 25% APR, that $15,000 will turn into $124,086.60 after I am done paying it in 15 years. Please keep in mind this loan is only for the first year of my schooling. WHAT!?! I don't know about you, but I can see why they put it in fine print.

Anyways, needless to say, I am very overwhelmed. Everyone says I shouldn't worry myself over the cost, but it is very hard.

Finding Roots, and Reconnecting

Do you ever feel like you need a second chance? I do... ALL THE TIME. There are so many times that I think back and cringe at the things I've done, how I treated people, or how I handled a situation. I wouldn't erase every single one of those regrets, but I often wish I was given the opportunity to apologize or "square things up". 

This past week has been a good one for me, because in some ways, I feel like I was given my second chance. I was able to reconnect with friends that I thought otherwise had moved on with their lives. Two of them, I have talked off and on with through out the last couple of years, but never really made time to get together. Last week, I finally had a chance for things to be like they use to be. No walls. No put-ons. Just friends. The biggest surprise for me though, was getting to meet up with an old friend from grade school. Now, this friendship ended on bitter and stupid terms. Thankfully we're passed whatever made us go our separate ways in the first place. I hope I keep getting opportunities like this. It makes the world so much more bearable, when you don't have so many walls up in your life.

I feel like this quote is a perfect ending to this post:
“Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending.”

Update on Project: Quilt

I found the best website today for fabric! Usually I am scrounging for fabric, but this website had so many things I loved at a very reasonable price. I am still trying to figure out exactly what I want to do as far as the color scheme, but I found some options that coordinate with some of the fabric I picked up at Walmart. 

These are my black and white/cream options:

                                    

These are my brown and taupe options:

These are my green options:

These are my orange options:

These are my yellow options:

I am still debating if I want to add in a little red, but I haven't even seen anything that I like. Once I figure out what my main color scheme is, I'll add in blocks of solid colors. So as you can tell this is still a work in progress, but it's getting there. 

...I'll keep you updated...

.:Closure:.

This is one of those more personal, but not detailed posts. Today was the last page of a book that was long over due to end. I'm finished with learning, listening, trying, and re-trying. After a roller coaster of emotions this afternoon, I finally feel like I can be done, and not wonder what if...

Liberated? Not quite. But I do feel like I can move on to something new. Have I made a fool of myself at times? Totally! But I tried so hard, no matter how retarded I made myself look. Was it worth it? Not sure yet.

This year, I have had to reflect a lot on the person I am and the person I want to be. I had to make tough decisions, one's that completely changed my life. I'm not sure at this point if "everything happens for a reason", but I do believe I was given the opportunity to learn from the situation.

I am probably not going to get this quote completely right, but it really hit home for me: "Change is on-going and inevitable, but how you deal with change makes all the difference in the outcome". I want to say it came from the "Especially for Mormons" book, but I could be wrong. I read this quote last January and think about it often. As I apply it to the last few years of my life, I can see how true that statement is. Nothing just happens. Making an effort, grabbing life by the horns, "just go with it",  or even the "maybe someday" complex all affect the outcome of change. Luckily for me, I don't feel like my life is pre-determined, so change is about to be a very positive thing to look forward to.

I have so much to be thankful for at the end of the day, which makes it so much easier to get over things like this. The best way to explain my new game plan is by the following...

"...solider on..."

Quick Thought: Yep, Fall is in the Air

I got in my car this morning and read the thermostat, 66 degrees. Can you believe it? The air has been getting crisp the last couple of mornings, which gets me even more excited for the holidays to come. The timing is perfect, because I'm planning on going to Tia Pan this week to "look" at Fall decorations. I will use anything as an excuse to go to Tia Pan and Hobby Lobby. As soon as September hits, I will in the Christmas section scoping out the new arrivals. 

Bing Crosby... Nat King Cole... and a little Dean Martin

I woke up this morning feeling Christmas in the air. I know it is only August, but I seem to always jump the gun on the Christmas season. It's tradition. I think this all started last night when I downloaded a new app on my iphone. What could it be? None other than the "Christmas Radio" app. I'm sitting here at work with my music beaming, and I keep getting awkward looks. Should I turn it down? NO! I will not! It makes me happy. So today I will enjoy the feeling "Jingle Bells" and "White Christmas" brings me. You can stick your nose in the air and think I'm crazy, but what does that make you? Yes, perhaps the word "Scrooge" comes to mind.

This brings me to my next topic, friends. I met one of my best friends at beauty school by talking about my love for holidays. Turns out she had the same love and obsession! We ended up being roommates for nearly two years and celebrated our crazy holiday feelings together.We weren't as bad as I am being now, but we had some great traditions. Fall Fest was arranged with the following activities: making "Throw Up" cookies (a la me), yummy muffins (made by Lindsay Lou), and Oh! the wonderful smell of Taco Soup! We took many rides to Great Harvest to pick up Pumpkin Spice bread, and on Thursday we met for lunch to pickup Spinach/Feta bread sandwiches. I think we even made a trip to Gardner Village to participate in a mystery dinner. That turned out to be pretty gay, but there were some good laughs. I miss those times! Growing up can be fun, but sometimes it makes relationships change. This post is in memory of that friendship and bond! I know she will appreciate it...

Here is a tribute to Fall and Christmas Fest:

And just for kicks... a memory of a late night...

Yes... That's right... Edgar!

decisions, decisions...

I have gone back and forth on going to the Art Institute here in Salt Lake or in Dallas over the past two years. Well that time is coming to an end. I HAVE to make a decision this week. (Scary!). I have been on a horrible roller-coaster ride with Admissions, Financial Aid, the FAFSA folks, and anyone else I had to talk to regarding enrollment. Here is the scary part, it wasn't that they were telling me things that I didn't know, it was that I was asking questions that none of them had answers to. What!?! I can't be the only person that has questions about consolidating loans, payment terms, and what to plan for over the duration of school. Well after I was told "I don't know" enough times by too many people, I finally got answers!

As of this moment, I am going to apply for my loans. Where you ask? Well... I will let you know as soon as I know if I am approved for my loans.

Project: Quilt

I have been shopping around for new bedding over the past six months. I haven't found anything that I am crazy about, so I decided I wanted to make my own. I am really into block quilts, but I want it to look more sophisticated than country. I went to Walmart of all places, and found some bolts of fabric that were $5.00 (what a steal!).

So here is my game plan: Some of the fabric was one solid color or muted, so I am now looking for some lace or sheer overlay fabric to add dimension. I am loving the color scheme of black, white, and yellow, but I want to add in earthy tones (like: taupe, various warm greens, and a little red/orange). I have a bold black and cream stripe, so I want to compliment it with an awesome textile or print. This all sounds very over-the-top by now, but I want something unique.

Now, I am not one to take others ideas, but the following images are some quilts that really stand out to me. They are a little more casual than the direction I want to go, but they have given me some ideas:

LOVE the yellow and black block at the top.

I want to stay away from traditional, but I love how they incorporated a floral design into a quilt.

I like the various black prints. I'm not a huge fan of the layout.

I like how they used various green and black prints.

...sand. sun. and the lake...

It seems like the older I get, the more paranoid I am about the water and all the things that could be in there (ridiculous, I know), but the last few years I have tried to swallow any anxiety I have about it. So that being said, my accomplishments this year have been tremendous from my own perspective. I have finally been able to balance enough to get up on the knee board and the slalom. Now, I am not bragging about my skills on the water (or lack there of), but I am very proud to say that I can now do more than just the wakeboard and skis. Eventually I'll see about crossing the wake more than once, but for now, I'll pat myself on the back for getting out of the boat and into the water. I'll try to post pictures later on...

...my red high heels moment...

With so many changes in my life, I decided I needed a new blog that is completely about me. The post title is a little misleading, but the overall thought is the same. I want to feel self-empowered, and that song completely does it for me. I want to be confident in my new journey, I want to love being me, and most of all I want to never look back and wonder what-if (I realize everyone does at some point).

So that being said, welcome to my life. The posts will be random, but what in life always makes sense?